Monday, January 14, 2013

Un-Friended for Jesus

Recently I was un-friended on facebook (by a former close friend). I'd like to say that I don't care, but that wouldn't be true.

The person who un-friended me is an atheist and blames Christians for all the problems of the world, so my general posts about Christ would have been unwelcome and I was quietly "un-friended".

I am comforted, though, because Jesus didn't come here to make friends. Matthew 10: 35-38 says:
Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to turn ‘a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law—a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’ Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; and anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.

So, what do I do about this? Well, I will continue to pray for salvation for my friend. The "un-friending" hurts, but it would hurt more to not see my friend in heaven. 

Have you ever been un-friended by a close friend? What did you do?

11 comments:

  1. So sorry, Dawn. I know what it is like to be "un-friended" by a close friend, though it wasn't on Facebook. The end of a close friendship hurts, even when we know the "reason" behind it.

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    1. Thanks, Pam. It's a bummer, but I won't lose hope.

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  2. I have. Not due to religious differences.

    In my case, I challenged a friend and her fiancé on his behaviour towards her. Despite appearing to me as though she understood my concerns and appreciated me looking out for her, she later sent me an e-mail saying she felt it was time to end our friendship.

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    1. Paul, Trying to help a friend in a relationship is tough. It sounds to me like you did the right thing if his behavior was less than desirable. She may have felt like she had to make a choice then between friend or fiance.

      Thanks for sharing/commiserating.

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    2. It wasn't an easy choice. But my wife had twins on the way (they were born in time for Christmas, two girls, and are gorgeous) and I knew I had to make sure they grew up seeing positive behaviour in our friends, with couples being respectful to each other.

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    3. Congratulations! What a Christmas present! Having children does change your priorities. Not to mention -- our friends often rub off on us. Sounds like you made the right decision, for your girls.

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    4. Thank you! I'm glad to say that the rest of our friends have all been incredibly supportive. It helps that many of them are having children of their own as well.

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  3. Well, people have been unfriended for less. Friendships are like relationships - they're wonderful while they last but they don't necessarily last forever. Religious beliefs are pretty deep-rooted so maybe religion is one of those irreconcilable differences... who knows. Oh well... don't sweat it!

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    1. Cathy, You make me laugh -- "people have been unfriended for less". I know it!

      Anyway, I'm okay. I won't sweat it, I'll just pray. Thanks for leaving you comment.

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  4. There's a possibility that this person still considers you a friend, but simply feels uncomfortable reading your status updates. I'm actually unsubscribed from most of my friends, just because sometimes, hopping online and being welcomed by a fray of impassioned and conflicted opinions is too much for me. I say "conflicted" because I'm friends with everyone from my homebirth advocate midwife, to my Seattle yoga class, to my missionary friends. It's just too much for a Monday morning.

    I unsubscribed/unfriended just about everyone I knew during the election season. From both sides.

    I've unfriended people I would hug and greet kindly in real life, just because they enjoyed arguing or playing devil's advocate on what I intended to be neutral posts, and I don't enjoy banter. At least not online. I'm always happy to talk politics and religion and birthing ethics face-to-face.

    Everyone has a different vision of what they want to get out of Facebook. For me, I want a cozy, stress-free environment, where I can sit back and see my friend's making pancakes for Thanksgiving and see everyone's kids grow up, while keeping them updated on my life as well.

    So don't feel too rejected. I'm sure your friend still loves you, and not wanting to see a consistent stream of Christian-themed memes and inspirational quotes is, I'm sure, more about feeling in control of their "online space" than pushing you or God himself away.

    The fact that they blame Christianity for all the world's problems is another story entirely, and it's going to make them feel like a victim as long as they believe it. That's an issue that will cause them a lot of unhappiness, and cost them real-life friendships. That part I'd pray for.

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    1. Christine, You are probably right. I'm sure deep inside he still considers me a friend. He's just not happy with my faith.

      I want to thank you for your kind words and taking the time to leave the comment. I really appreciate that.

      BTW, I usually don't "unfriend" anyone. Instead, if comments get on my nerves, I "hide" their posts for awhile....that way there are no hurt feelings.

      Take care.

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I appreciate your comments! I try to respond to each one.